Mental Ecosystems (Again)

This afternoon, some friends and I were talking about how we were constantly playing catch up.  That no matter how much work we do, it’s never enough.  We’re like the hedgehog Tattoo had a kid.  The creature used to run on its wheel all night long without ever gaining any ground.  That’s what we’re doing.  We’re going non-stop – writing, marketing, working day jobs – and at the end of the day, we’re in the same place we were when we began.  And frankly, we’re exhausted. We’re tired of playing catch up; we want to make some forward motion.

And so we decided to double down on our efforts to create joy in our lives.

I’ve blogged about  building a better mental ecosystem before. At the end of 2017, I announced that I was going to go fallow in order to grow a newer, better Barb. Unfortunately my fallow period lasted a little longer than I intended. But, I’m ready to sprout. 2019 is going to be my year of fresh growth.

For real this time. I mean it. Pinky swear and everything.

I see myself starting with four steps:

  1. Prune things that don’t give me a positive return.  (I was going to say joy, but in the case of the day job, it’s not so much joy as a weekly paycheck.)  There are things in my life that I’ve been clinging to either out of loyalty or fear of missing out that, when I think about it, no longer fit in my life.  Certain social media accounts for example and certain professional organizations.   Come 2019, they are out of here.
  2. Practice daily self-care. That could mean spending ten minutes working on a book of my heart or having a cup of fresh brewed coffee.  Or pruning something unnecessary out of my life.  Good self care is about doing what’s right for you.
  3. Stand in my truth. In other words, I’m renewing my goal to be myself and be comfortable with who I am, flaws and all.  Trust me, that’s not an easy thing to do – especially if you were raised in my family.
  4. Improve my self-talk. The things I say in my head I would never say to my bestie. In fact, most times I would say the opposite. I am going to start treating myself like my best friend. After all, if you don’t love yourself, how can you love others?

If I can accomplish these things even 50% of the time, I will be moving forward. So who’s with me? What do you need to do in order to grow in 2019?






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